The Nail Stuck Up Your Ass

A man named Frank went to visit his friend Carl who lived in the country.

Carl was the stereotypical country boy. He chewed tobacco, talked with a southern drawl, wore plaid shirts and cowboy boots, hunted, fished, and raised chickens. He even got up every day at 4:30 in the morning to work on his farm.

However, Carl was more than a typical southern boy. He had an MBA and worked for 20 years as a successful investment banker before retiring. He was the most intelligent man Frank knew.

Before Carl retired, both men lived in the same town and went to the same church. They were friends and talked about everything.

For over 20 years, Frank wanted to quit his job and start a business. He told no one. Every Friday, Frank wanted to take the leap, but he never did. He was afraid.

For six months, Frank had not been happy at work. His new boss was a jerk, and the company started making changes in the pay plan. He wondered if he should go out on his own, but he was afraid. There were too many risks.

Frank decided to visit Carl and get his advice.

When Frank arrived at Carl’s farm, he saw Carl was sitting on a blue Adirondack chair and drinking a beer. Next to him sat an old hound dog howling in pain.

Carl got up and gave Frank a big bear hug. He reached into a blue and white cooler, pull out a beer, and handed it to his friend.

The hound dog continued to whimper in pain as the two men talked.

Frank couldn’t take it anymore. He had to know why the dog was in pain.

“Uh, Carl. Why is your dog howling?”

“Cause he’s sitting on a nail.” Carl grabbed a red plastic cup and spat tobacco in it.

“A nail,” Frank couldn’t believe it. “Why doesn’t he just get up?”

Carl sipped on his beer. “I guess it doesn’t hurt that bad.”

The dog howled again as if to accentuate Carl’s point.

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